Going Solo

My grandmother called while I was getting ready to go to the movies- I said I couldn't talk for too long because I was going to the movies by myself.
"Oh, why are you going alone?" She asked in a sympathetic voice.
"No no- It's a good thing!" I said fervently. She didn't want to keep me from my showing so we said goodbye and I headed out the door.
"Okay sweetie, are you gonna be a good girl for papa? Do you need to go pee pee?"
"No." Came the sweet reply. I wondered which question she was answering.

"Sweetheart, if you're going, just go or you'll be late." My husband said from behind the computer.

I couldn't help but feel giddy as I walked out the door carrying only my purse (less than 10lbs) and my car keys. Three pairs of emergency undies, one wet-bag, two pairs of emergency pants, one emergency shirt, sunscreen for the odd occasion, snacks, wipes, toys, comb, extra hair-ties, water bottle, juice pack and extra pair of shoes just seem like the bare necessities these days, so I had a bit of a naked feeling also as I got into the car and started the engine. With an empty car seat, no babbling, screaming, pointing out of random things, and certainly no odor of freshly opened crackers, I was on my way to the Thursday matinee. I'll admit- I actually giggled to myself in the car. I'm a staunch advocate of Attachment Parenting, yet I do wonder when the phase of "bye-mom!" really swings into effect.
I parked the car and walked in like a normal human- not having to lug a foot dragging toddler or play "I'm going to go limp and hang on your hand in the parking lot".
I bought my single ticket and walked right past the concessions- I did have my grapes in my Elmo tupperware after all.
I was the first in the empty theatre, apparently with lots of time to spare. I walked to the middle row and sat down, appraising the view. I changed my mind unselfconsciously and decided to try a different row. Up two stairs and right in the center I plopped down and waited. It was so quiet, I could actually notice myself breathing. I was in awe that I had absolutely no reason to run up and down the stairs or to the bathroom 16 times. At first I just read the small town advertisements that silently flicked across the screen. Once they began to repeat, I tried to just relax and do nothing. I thought to myself, it's actually tranquil enough to really have a chance to meditate. I closed my eyes and wondered at the silence. It made me sleepy. I guess I'm hard wired now to sleep when the noise stops. When I opened my eyes, I noted the admonishing ad on the screen: "Babies are cute...  But if yours is crying please leave the theatre."
Fair enough I suppose- they aren't banning babies, just telling parents that there's no point in trying to go to the movies because they'll spend 45% of The Hobbit in the hallway bouncing and shushing. If by miraculous chance you do get your baby to sleep, it will most likely be twenty minutes before the movie ends and then you'll have to move and that starts the whole thing over again.
     Another sole patron of the 4:35 matinee enters the theatre which shifts my attention back from mom-thoughts. I watch quietly as he chooses a seat, sits, then gets up to find a "better" one just as I had done.
It seemed to me that one should instigate small talk in this sort of situation, two people in an empty theatre waiting for the film to roll, but something held me back from polluting the beautiful silence.
The minutes dragged on and I was silently thanking not having to entertain anyone but myself.
When I could bear it no longer, I asked the other patron for the time, as it seemed later than it should. Seconds later the previews began, and I awkwardly muttered something to the effect of, "...just when I was starting to wonder." Silence greeted me from the other row and I ruled out any further comments. Nothing worse than going to a movie alone only to be bombarded by a Chatty Cathy.
About halfway through the action packed "Guardians of the Galaxy", I found myself wondering what my hubby and daughter were doing without me at home. Was she crying? Did she pee her pants? Are they having a tea-party or watching Daniel Tiger's Neighborhood?
I must say that I enjoyed the film and also my "me time", but the minute the credits began to roll I hopped up out of my seat and briskly walked out of the theatre to my car. As I drove the short trip home, I wondered how I would be greeted at the door. I certainly didn't expect what came.
I turned the key in the lock and walked through the door, expecting to hear a "Mommy!!" but instead got a big "BOO!!" from behind the door.
AH yes, favorite pass-time of the marital lifestyle- scaring your spouse when they least expect it. They were both rewarded with my brief shout and slight jump. Ha.Ha. Teaching the next generation the important things in life- like being able to give your mom a mild heart-rate increase.

All in all, mission success hopefully to be repeated soon.